I reached school to pick up little Miss Haana one day this week. Miss Haana was holding her snack bowl, half way filled with bite sized apple pieces. As soon as she saw me, she quickly stuffed a couple pieces in her mouth, but there too many more to go in the bowl, it was not empty. She hesitantly walked towards me and reluctantly told me she hadn't been able to finish her snack just yet, but she was working on it. (I might have been gently perusing her to ensure that she finish her snack (fruit) at school every day).
I had a mixed rollercoaster reaction when i saw her:
First, it was comic relief. It was comical to see her quickly stuff her mouth with multiple fruit pieces and then drag her feet to report to me!
Then, it was pure unadulterated satisfaction. Getting her to eat is no mean task. That my nagging and threats actually do succeed to some degree, called for some serious pat on the back. I was secretly proud of myself- for just that moment anyway.
Then, of course not far behind, it was guilt. How mean must she think i am, if she behaves like that! Am i just too strict with her sometimes? Do i get carried away with frustration at times?
But then finally, it was doubt. Is she really this meek little mouse like she's making it out to be right now? This is the little thing who, given a choice (out of exasperation) to eat her dinner or go for a timeout; gets down from her chair, begins her angry im-mad-at-you-too-crying; goes without any qualms for timeout; refuses to come back till i concede she is not going to have to eat any more. Compare that to this little thing stuffing apples in her face so i don't see the snack is not finished. Hmm, is she playing me? Or am i really the evil mean mom?
Definitely not asking that question.
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