Levels of Defense

There are several tactics at play against me these days.

On this last weekend, when I asked little Miss Haana to do something she didn't want to do, she first threw out her first line of defense. Her first tactic is ignore.

She was standing right there barely 10 yards from me, and pretending like I never said anything. It never fails to make me mad. So, i switched from calling her "Gugu", to Suhaana, along with a slight touch of the sinister in my tone.

It must have had some effect. She switched to second line of defense - plead tactic. "Pleaaaaaseee mumma!". Other than being annoying- the pleases are not going to abate until heeded-  it also has a psychological impact. The yearning in the pleading, begs to ask how heartless would someone have to be to turn the poor poor child down. "No!", i stuck to my guns. She retorted with "Hmph! Mumma is too mean". I pretend it doesn't matter to me.

Then, her third line of defense - bargain. Maybe she knows my resolve is probably weakening, she now switches to bargain mode. "Only for a little bit Mumma! Only half a video". Again, how could i possibly be so unreasonable so as to turn down such a well meaning, good hearted, desperate plea for videos are that obviously needed for her well balanced, all rounded development! 'Oh, not the half video trap again!', I'm thinking to myself! But this time, i had been fooled just one too many times! "No", i refused.

Fourth line of defense- tantrum. Angry, frustrated crying ensues. Followed by "I'm telling on you". To be honest i find the Im-telling-on-you part totally funny!  On occasions when i actually laugh out loud, it only gets the little girl madder.

Somehow,  after battling through multiple lines of defenses, traversing multitudes of odds, navigating physical mental psychological tests of time and resolve, after all of that- success is finally mine. Sometimes anyway! And until next time😊

Rough Nights

Last few nights have been especially rough. The little girl is getting up at 3AM like clockwork. Crying and cranky. And not ready to calm down. Tried to reassure her, we're there for her, cuddle her, pat her back to sleep, offer her pacifier, distract her with music, tried to burp her, change her diaper. Tried to get her to sleep next to me instead of the crib, offer her milk. But nothing works for longer than a minute or so. And the end of which, she's crying again. This goes on and on for more than one and half hour.

I'm pretty positive it's not hunger. Her last feeding is 11PM, and she can go much longer than 4 hours in the night without needing to get up to snack. I personally feel, she's used to sleeping on her side during the day (in her pack-n-play, during the day, she sleeps on her side propped by pillows - have ok-ed the pillows in pack-n-play since she's never unattended while she's in there. But in the crib, strictly follow the guidelines of n.o.t.h.i.n.g. in the crib for safety), and she tries to sleep on the side in the crib. But with no pillows to support this sideways sleeper, she tends to fall on her tummy and wake up sleepy and frustated.

After an hour of constant crying at 3AM, I have to say, I start loosing it. And that is, inspite of the fact that I know that small babies are just communicating a need by crying (as opposed to older kids who may be capable of throwing a tantrum). I think about it and I feel so bad for her. But, yesternight even though I was trying my best to be patient and reassuring and comforting.. Towards the end, I was loosing it. I think the little girl could sense the tension too, 'cause the poor thing cried harder. I feel so bad now when I think about it. I got her on the bed, propped her on her side using pillows, made sure she's safe and then I actually left her and walked out of the room to take a breather. She kept crying for a little bit, then fell asleep. In a minute or so, all was quiet.

For tonight, I intend to make her prop on her side in the crib (ensuring she's safe as well). I don't know how it will go tonight, but atleast I have a plan.